5 things you can do to become religious

It is popular today for folks to be religious.  The world loves religion and thinks kindly of religious people. It is popular to tell people you are religious, no matter what religion you want to be.

If you don’t like one religion, you can seek another one you like better. The world is full of them. If you look long enough you can find a religion that suits your needs and will make you feel religious.

In order to feel more religious here is a list of 5 things to shore up your feelings of being religious.

  1. Read your Bible 15 minutes every day, seven days a week. If that becomes too tedious for you, cut back to 10 minutes a day. But be consistent. That is important for maximum religious acceptance.
  2. Memorize the Lord’s prayer and John 3:16. You will impress lots of people with your command of Scripture. Pray the Lord’s Prayer often.  When you can, say it so others around you will hear you praying.  If you really want to feel religious try reciting the Lord’s Prayer when you’re out to dinner with friends (if your friends don’t mind you saying the blessing). For added pleasure know the 10 commandments and be prepared to discuss them sometimes in public.
  3. Go to church at least once a month.
  4. Find out and follow the traditions and rituals of your religion. You may find some of them silly or legalistic, but the elation you will experience when you perform them will elevate you on an unparalleled religious high.
  5. Learn to use religious vernacular. When people start telling you their troubles, say things like, “God is in control.” or “This too shall pass.” or “I’ll pray for you.” When  you’re in a crowd of other religious people say, “God is good.” You’ll hear others respond, “All the time.”  When  you hear someone say, “God is good.” say back to them, “All the time.”

If you’ll do all these things, and do them religiously, you’ll soon feel so religious you’ll want to shout it from the rooftops (if, of course, that is acceptable behavior in your religion).

 

 

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