Have you ever considered . . .?

I have a confession to make: I like dumb jokes. In fact, the dumber the joke (and the more groans I generate by telling them) the more fun I have.

I have another confession to make: I didn’t feel compelled to write a Monday blog post. God didn’t give me any words to write (of if He did, I may not have been listening).

It’s been a rough week, so I want to laugh a bit today. Here’s some funny (I think) stuff. It has absolutely no redeeming spiritual or social value, but maybe you’ll find something to laugh about as you consider . . .

• How do you get off a non-stop flight?
• How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
• How many months are there in a light year?
• If cats and dogs didn’t have fur would we still pet them?
• If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made of?
• If swimming is good for your shape, why do whales look the way they do?
• If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
• Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game, when we are already there?
• Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
• Since bread is square, why is sandwich meat round?
• Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
• What did cured ham actually have that it needed to be cured from?
• How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
• Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up every two hours?
• How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?
• Why isn’t “phonetic” spelled the way it sounds?
• If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?
• Why is it when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
• How can there be self-help “groups”?
• Is there another word for synonym?

P.S. If you have a really dumb (and clean) (I mean really really dumb[and clean]) joke, I’d love you to share it with me.  I mean dumb like you’d be embarrassed if any of your friends knew you knew it. That dumb.

So, have a Happy Monday and laugh a little today.